A little snowstorm can’t keep ladies from brunch!
My mom died on July 18, 2013, of pancreatic cancer, a subtle blade that slips into the host so imperceptibly that by the time a presence is felt, it is almost always too late. Living about 16 months after her diagnosis, she was “lucky,” at least by the new standards of the parallel universe of cancer world. We were all lucky and unlucky in this way. Having time to watch a loved one die is a gift that takes more than it gives.
Psychologists call this drawn out period “anticipatory grief.” Anticipating a loved one’s death is considered normal and healthy, but realistically, the only way to prepare for a death is to imagine it. I could not stop imagining it. I spent a year and a half writing my mother a goodbye letter in my head, where, in the private theater of my thoughts, she died a hundred times. In buses and movie theaters, on Connecticut Avenue and 5th Avenue, on crosswalks and sidewalks, on the DC metro and New York subway, I lost her, again and again. To suffer a loved one’s long death is not to experience a single traumatic blow, but to suffer a thousand little deaths, tiny pinpricks, each a shot of grief you hope will inoculate against the real thing.
A boundless black terror is how I imagined life without my mom. The history of grief, or what we know of it, is written by its greatest sufferers and ransacked with horror stories, lugubrious poetry, and downward-spiraling memoirs plunged in sadness. For some people, the death of a loved one is truly life-stopping, and I worried it would stop mine.
This starts off a tad depressing but really brings it home.
HIDDEN COSTS OF SUBURBAN SPRAWL: A recent report from the University of Ottawa has outlined the hidden costs of suburban sprawl. According to the study, suburbanization will cost cities and its taxpayers much more than the revenue and income it produces. Read more…
Why I’ll never move to the suburbs. Or Canada? Regardless.
- My Family.
- My Family’s health after a particularly trying year.
- My extended Family of long-time friends and godparents, and that we are able to spend every holiday with them.
- My Friends who continue to amaze me as individuals and as the best support system around.
- My Job. For all its stress and challenges, I am grateful to even have a job, especially one that I enjoy and have thrived in.
- Life testing us this year with challenges that really enforce the theme of not sweating the small stuff. Or even problems or events that seem big but will be just a speck in your life’s memories.
- The fact that 2013 is almost behind us. What a crappy year.
- The hope that 2014 will be amazing.
21 million students a year rely on free and reduced lunch as their main energy source, but over 25% of meals are thrown away each day. Upload a picture of your school lunch and answer 10 multiple choice questions to be entered to win a $4,000 scholarship.
Not only are these lunches nasty and completely devoid of any nutrition, they’re so wasteful with plastic containers and styrofoam everywhere.
Thank you, Mom, for never allowing me to eat a school lunch in my 18 years of primary/secondary schooling.
GROSS. And sad.
When Septa loses power. For no good reason. For 25 minutes. And no explanation or eta of when we will no longer be stranded.
This week, America’s most endearing megastar took her new, debatably pixie-ish haircut on the road to promote Catching Fire, which dropped at midnight. Predictably, her various interviews this week gave us insights into her stomach troubles, love for the Kardashians, and affection for Woody Harrelson. Vulture has a nice roundup of quotes in case you feel like reading about a famous person’s struggles with crapping her pants.
This Week’s Top 5 TV Moments on Flavorwire
Girl crush continues.